Ryan O’Neal Wasn’t Afraid Of Death, Wanted To Join Late Farrah Fawcett ‘In Heaven’


Ryan O'Neal Farrah FawcettRyan O'Neal Farrah Fawcett

After a 20-year battle with Leukemia, Paper Moon actor Ryan O’Neal died on December 8, 2023. Ryan, who died at 82, was reportedly unafraid to die because he looked forward to reuniting with his late lover, Farrah Fawcett.

Ryan and Farrah never married; however, they have had a long-term on-and-off relationship since 1979 and shared a son, Redmond O’Neal. The couple stayed together until Farrah died from anal cancer in 2009. “I loved her with all my heart,” Ryan said after her passing. “I will miss her so very, very much.”

Ryan’s “ray of hope”

Ryan O'Neal Farrah FawcettRyan O'Neal Farrah Fawcett
GOOD SPORTS, Ryan O’Neal, Farrah Fawcett, 1991. © Brillstein-Grey Entertainment / Courtesy: Everett Collection

Per insider reports, “Ryan knew he was dying, but his one ray of hope was that he would be reunited with Farrah.”

“He never stopped loving or missing her. She was on his mind a lot at the end. His last words were of her. He said, ‘I’ll finally get to see you, Farrah.’” the source added.

The celebrity couple went through a rough patch due to Ryan’s infidelities, which led to their shocking separation in 1990. While Farrah was on her sickbed after their reunion, Ryan remained at her bedside till her last breath. “Farrah was undoubtedly Ryan’s greatest love,” the insider added.

Ryan O'Neal Farrah FawcettRyan O'Neal Farrah Fawcett
SMALL SACRIFICES, Farrah Fawcett, Ryan O’Neal, 1989, © ABC / Courtesy: Everett Collection

Ryan wished he was a better lover

Ryan regretted how he treated Farrah at the peak of their time together. A close friend of the late actor confirmed that Farrah’s death was a hard blow for him. “He’s obsessed. He talks to her portrait. He asks her permission before he does anything,” they said. “It’s like she’s running his life from beyond the grave,”

Ryan O'Neal Farrah FawcettRyan O'Neal Farrah Fawcett
SMALL SACRIFICES, Ryan O’Neal, Farrah Fawcett, 1989

While on his deathbed, Ryan still referred to his tumultuous relationship with Farrah and how he could have been better. “During the time he lay in bed at the end, he spoke about how much he regretted the time they wasted apart and that they only got back together during the last part of her life,” the source recalled.


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